Long Life, Joy and Prosperity

+ + +
She looks like little Jiyun :3
It’s a pretty good movie, definitely not your typical heart-warming romantic comedy, but it’s thought-provoking and had such a contrast between color and greyness.

+ + +
Well, yeah, this was absolutely the worst week for me. Busy, tired, PMSing, love sick. Had to work. A band concert. Wasn’t able to keep up with anything.

I’ve been having such strange dreams lately. Again.
I stayed in last night. After stopping by Noba Sushi on Pleasant Valley Way and chatting with the store owner–whose name is Kim, I found out last night–I bought myself a Dragon roll and some miso soup. Went home, curled up on my lazy boy chair and put on a movie. It was nice, I suppose. Delicious.

Of course, this had to be the week before my period. When all my emotions are intensified. And all I could think about…
I wonder if he misses it as much as I do. Being together, because we fit.
I sometimes wonder if each and every puzzle piece made for every different puzzle is a different shape from any other piece from other puzzles. Like if I were to mix two different boxes, would I find pieces from another puzzle to fit this one? Maybe that’s how we were. Using pieces from two puzzles we attempted to produce the big picture. Of course, It couldn’t work.

Now there are no more leaves.
Autumn is a transition season. It’s like Spring, but the opposite. In Spring, it starts out really cold, the trees are bare, and gradually it becomes warmer, sunnier, and the leaves grow back. In Autumn, it starts out really warm, then it gets colder, the leaves start to die and fall. Hm. I suppose Autumn isn’t the best time to start something. Sigh.
+ + +
I got my SAT scores back. And i’m happy with them… my scores went up by a few hundred points from last time. And i’m also happy to say that my scores meet the minimum for Maryland (UMD is pretty competitive.)
Also,
Maryland received all my early application stuff! :

Received	Document Title
	Application Freshman Part 1
	High School Transcript (1 of 1 received)
	Test Score
	Find Your Niche Statement
	Activities Statement
	Essay
	Recommendation letter from teacher (2 of 2 received)
	Recommendation letter from counselor (1 of 1 received)
	MD Residency Form ( )
	Miscellaneous ( )

Alissa showed me her college debt, to this day. $33,000+. She went to school in 1991, when I was born. I don’t really know what to make of it. That truth threw my whole existence into question. Is there a way I can pursue my dreams without having to spend so much money? I don’t want to be in debt. I can’t. But.. it’s my time to leave. I can’t spend my life paying off debt. How do the artists at RISD support themselves afterwards if they pay over 45,000+ a year?

On Wednesday I stayed after school in my AP Envi class to make up a test. My teacher wasn’t there, but another teacher, Mrs. DePalma was there. I never knew who she was until she spoke to me. She was speaking with another student who stayed after. He looked like he was doing a worksheet. I overheard her tell the student that he wasn’t doing honors level work, and that she would not put him in honors classes if he turned in such bad work. The boy stood up, and rudely ran out of the classroom. She sighed.
I was sitting at an extra computer in the back looking at Syracuse, and she sat at the computer next to me, checking a powerpoint. She started to talk to me.
“I have to make this powerpoint for class. It’s about teaching styles.”
“Oh, I like making power points.”
“Yes, well, I do too, but with a lot of time…(she clicks through her slides, she has already adjusted the monitor to face me) I don’t have much animation though. Except for that one. I should print this out, we aren’t allowed to read from the presentation.”
“You should use note cards.”
“Oh, that’s a good idea.”
Silence.
“I don’t know what to do about that child.” She said.
“Oh.. um.. there aren’t many kids who are motivated these days.”
“Are you motivated?”
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“Well.. what I want to do seems a little impossible. My dreams, I mean. You see, my parents were born and raised in the Philippines. They want me to graduate and find a job quickly and earn a lot of money, and it’s understandable. But to be honest, money isn’t my first priority. They don’t understand that I want to live life from experience to experience. I actually want to pursue a dream. I don’t need anything expensive, shoes, a new car, I’d rather save that money. And…I just feel like I want to prove them wrong. My family. I want to show them I can be happy and successful. But I know it’s going to be hard.”
“That’s–wonderful.”
I smile. “Yeah…”
“You know…i’ve been teaching for a long time and I can just see it in students. I mean, I just met you but… I believe in you.”
I look at her. “Thank you.. I.. really appreciate that.”

+ + +
I don’t know what will become of me.